A few weeks ago, I received a great email spam. It wasn't great because it was spam; it was great because the message unintentionally underscored an important part of being successful. In part, the spam said:

Ever wish you could ...

• Tailor your message to achieve complete buy-in on your ideas and proposals?
• Disarm others' "hot buttons" and put people at ease — even in the heat of an argument?
• Win arguments without losing friends?
• Deliver razor-sharp instructions that get things done — without coming off like an annoying perfectionist?
• Become so persuasive that your requests are rarely denied?

The email was advertising a workshop about communication (for CareerTrack's "How to Communicate with Tact and Professionalism") but really most of this is achieved automatically when we set the context of a conversation.

Think about the meetings you attend, and the conversations you have with others. When we don't provide context, requests are often perceived as demands, questions as criticism, vision as marching orders. The rest of the conversation "inexplicably" takes on a negative tone. How many meetings have you attended where this has happened?

When we take a few moments at the beginning of the conversation, provide background information and explain the context of the questions, everything is perceived differently by your audience. Context sets a positive tone of the conversation that follows.

Take a moment in your meetings to create context, and evaluate with others if you have provided sufficient background information before discussion begins. I think you'll find that your discussion will go much more smoothly.